July 11th 2014 1 comment so far
Every single person has a mental image of “the one” he or she is waiting for. We have created a picture of their appearance, personality, career, beliefs, and even behavior, some more detailed than others. While all of our preferences and definitions of “the one” differ superficially, I believe that at the core of our hearts we all define “the one” as the following:
The one I’ll spend my life with.
The one who will complete me.
The one who will love me as I am.
The one who will make me happy.
The one I will love with all of my heart.
The one I will devote myself to.
The one who will be faithful to me.
The one who will cherish me.
This is an excellent list of things to want, to hope for, and desire, but there is a problem: no one person on earth can fulfill everything on this list. No one will complete you fully. No one will make you happy all of the time. No one will accept every part of you without criticism at some point. No one will cherish you as deeply as you desire to be cherished. No one will be everything you have dreamed of and hoped for. We are all human. We hurt, disappoint, and fall short of each other’s expectations. There is no perfect “one.” But there is a perfect One.
While you are waiting to find “the one,” don’t wait to find the One.
We all have these same core, God-given desires. God does not give us desires that cannot be filled. He gave us hunger and provided food for us to eat. He gave us thirst and provided water for us to drink. For every desire, He has given us what we need to fulfill that desire. He gave us these longings for love, completion, companionship, and perfect union because He has provided something to meet those needs—His Son. The problem is we are seeking other fallen people, like ourselves, to fulfill our needs perfectly when they cannot. Certainly, other people can meet a portion of our needs. Spouses can love and cherish and be faithful. But God alone can complete the soul. Jesus Christ alone can love you all day, every day, unconditionally. He alone can cherish every hair on your head, every expression of your face, every cry of your soul. He alone can fill that void in your heart.
You don’t have to wait for the One while you are waiting for a spouse. You can find Him now. He will always love you. He will always be faithful. He will never leave nor forsake you. He will always provide.
Use this time of waiting for a spouse to develop your relationship with the Lord. The time you have as a single person is sacred. Paul writes about this to the Corinthians:
“He that is unmarried careth for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord: But he that is married careth for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife…And this I speak for your own profit; not that I may cast a snare upon you, but for that which is comely, and that ye may attend upon the Lord without distraction.” (1 Corinthians 7:32-35)
The single adult has an advantage over the married adult: he or she may serve the Lord without distraction. We can devote our time, energy, and passion completely to Christ without the responsibilities of a spouse and children. That is not saying we should never marry, but that while we wait to get married, we should use our time the way God intended: to know and serve Him.
You are not single because God is late in bringing you the person He has chosen for you. You are single because God has chosen to keep you to Himself a little longer. He doesn’t want to share your attention yet. He does not want your fellowship with Him and your service to Him distracted. He wants you for Himself today.
Don’t waste your single life waiting. Seek the Lord. Desire His heart. Read His Word. Talk to Him. Listen to Him. Get to know Him as best as you can while no one else needs your attention. You are a member of His church, His bride, and He is your groom. So give yourself to Him. While you have been waiting on a person, He has been waiting for you.
We are supposed to love God more than anything and anyone. Learn to love God more now, and when He brings the right person to you, you will know how to keep God first in your heart—and how to love that person as he or she deserves to be loved.
by Amy Hyles
Click here to visit the Life Learning area of the Stonebriar Community Church website to grow your relationship with God.
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